a week to remember

when you love someone, and you miss her a lot,
when she is always on your mind, and to be with her is what you are longing for.
and that feeling when she does not feel the same way too,
when her words strikes you; she needed some time away from you,

it's as if your heart is being shut off, and when you force yourself to stop those longing affection,
it's when you force yourself not to feel, when you try to control your mind and heart to stop longing for her,
the deep hurt knowing that what she needed is time and not you, while all you needed is her all the time.

when your everyday starts to be filled up with your loved one,
when your world is filled with her, and she is in everything that you do, you'd share everything with her.
when she is the one that you'd always long to share, and being with her is your new normal;
and that pinch of time when you know she needed some space from you,

the rejection, the agony and the deep silent pain,
knowing that your presence is the one that she wants to avoid,

you know you need to restrain yourself, you know what she needed, and you want to give her what she needs most, ... time,
with every passing time, whenever she comes to your mind, the pain that you feel inside, and the battle in your mind, fighting the urge to scream, to control yourself, to win from your heart, when your heart is the one being hurt the most.

it's just not her fault, time is what she needed. maybe it's just you falling in too deep. your addiction and your lust taking over, her becoming your only world.

so you turn back to what you know best, ignorance. Ignorance is bliss. when you don't think, you don't expect anything, and when you cease to expect, you stop hurting. You keep yourself busy and surround yourself with friends, but every night you come home, alone, and the thoughts keep coming back, when rest is what you need, but restless sleep is what nights keep.

you keep telling yourself, mind over matters, what's most important should not be at the mercy of what's less important, what she needs over my selfish emotion, brain over hearts, decisions over emotions.
focus yourself on the good things in life, gratitude, and try to reorganize your life. Rejoice and thank God! you know it's hard, but you know that God is on your side.

Some words of encouragement that may helps you through:

there is time for everything under the sun. and you know, when it's time, you'll see that God is crafting you something beautiful according to His mind.

come to me all yee with heavy burden, you will find rest, for my yoke is easy,

I can do all things through Christ who strengthen me.

The Lord your God, wouldn't give you any problems greater than what you can handles. for every time He shuts one door, He opens another.